Calming the Dragon Within

We all have them. The rough days or weeks where you wonder why you bothered getting out of bed. It is so easy to lash out in frustration to those who cross your path. Might as well share the misery, right?! This has a negative ripple effect.
 
Anger is a reaction to someone knowingly or unknowingly violating your values. When I say values, I mean something deeper than family or community values. Trust, connection and so many more are the values I am talking about. *   When our core values are trodden on then we can go from calm to livid in 2.8 seconds.
 
So how to we fortify or heal ourselves enough to be able to manage this?
 

1. Become aware of what your core values are and how well they have been satisfied in your present life. 
   1. There are many ways to find out what your core values are.  What is your favourite animal and what is it that you admire or respect in them the most?  That question will give you quite a few values.
   2. When your core values are not being satisfied in your life, it will be easier to hit the ballistic button in challenging situations.  Conversely, if your values are mostly or entirely satisfied, then there is more of a buffer.  This buffer allows you to stop, think and choose if you want to react or not. 
2. Remember to Breathe
   1. It is so challenging to remember to breathe when something has triggered us, but if we can take 5 breaths before reacting it will also give us time. During this time, we can decide if it worth reacting to and how we want to react.  This of course is easier if we have done step one first.
3. Take time to recharge
   1. When anger and frustration come quickly in our lives it can be an indication that we need to recharge our batteries.  What do you do to bring joy or a spark into your life? Do more of that when you feel like everything is annoying you. This will help you recharge your energy and satisfy any core values you may not have fully identified yet.  

 
Although these suggestions look simple, they are not always easy.  It means really getting to know ourselves and taking personal responsibility.  This can be a huge challenge when we are used to putting the responsibility for our anger in the hands of other people.  It means taking our power back and mindfully taking the stand to no longer passively give power to others.  We may not be able to decide or change the situation we are in, but we can change how we react and interact in it. 
 
What are your thoughts?  What has helped you move past the anger?
 
 
*Here is a list of values compiled by James Clear that is quite good.
https://jamesclear.com/core-values

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